How to use home chores to increase your child’s self-confidence!

Parent’s work and a child’s self-confidence seem two areas with absolutely no connection between them. What if weconnect these areas? –  We can make your work easier, we can save your time, by better using children’s needs, to test and improve their abilities. 

Principles : 

1. Ask the child to do only what is adapted to his age and abilities (A task too difficult, can be dangerous. It brings frustration, decreased motivation and self-confidence. A task too easy might be boring and would not increase the child’s self-confidence) 

2. Do not ask the child for more than 3 types of home chores / day. Too many different chores do not allow the child to focus on what he is doing.  Too many different chores do not allow the child to value what he does, do not let the child the time required to observe what he has accomplished, to enjoy the results.

3. Don’t claim perfection every time. Of course keeping the house clean is very important. But this time the goal is to increase the child’s self-confidence rather than obtain a perfectly antiseptic house.

4. Make sure you supervise any tasks involving potential dangers ! Children today handle tablets and iphoneseven before knowing how to walk. But it’s better not to overestimate their skills. Of course children will know how topress a button. All buttons and switches in the house. But children do not know what is behind these buttons, they do not know what are the potential dangers of these buttons.

How : 

Step 1 : Motivate the child : Explain to your child that you need his help ! 

Step 2 : Explain to the child what you want from him. For small children is necessary to spell out IN DETAIL all the actions. For example : hang up your clothes, pick up toys and books, etc. To an older child you may ask a GENERAL GOAL, a general objective and let him define and apply the tasks, the actions  needed to achieve that goal. 

Step 3 : If necessary, first demonstrate to your child how to do that chore.

Step 4 : Encourage the child  to focus his attention on the goal.  If necessary supervise your child’s work and advise him. 

Step 5 : Every time the child has completed his chore thank him or tell him a few words of appreciation. 

Step 6 : Praise your child to other family members, friends and neighbours. Tell everyone how proud you are of your child, how diligent and skilful he is. 

Suggested chores for different ages

You know better what your child is able and interested to do. These are only a few suggestions.  

2-3 year-olds 

  • Pick up toys and books.
  • Put clothes on clothes hooks or in the dirty washing basket.
  • Wash fruits and vegetables
  • dust

4-5 year-olds

  • Under supervision, help with meal preparation and service (tear the lettuce, make a bowl of cereal, set and clean up the table, break eggs, knead the dough, add some ingredients, etc)  
  • Water flowers.
  • Make own bed and wipe down surfaces
  •  Match socks 
  • sort white clothes from dark clothes for laundry 
  • Prepare with a parent the Sunday morning breakfast.

6-8 year-olds

  • Water the garden and indoor plants.
  • Take care of pets.
  • Take out the rubbish.
  • Wash dishes.
  • Under supervision, help with meal preparation and serving (make simple recipes, wash and cut vegetables, whips eggs or cream)